My alone time - Sacrificed

so upon getting to work and attempting to get a hotel for the rest of my stay, i find out there is a room available but there is nothing in town for the last night. so the office manager lets me stay in her spare 'oom last night. which is cool we cooked out and another co-worker popped over who is from Brighton. and it was lovely. however, both insist. INSIST. that i stay up there and "live" a little while i am here and not work so much.

i had originally planned for this two weeks to be a time of contemplation, reflection, and questioning. searching for answers to what i realized in the last week is a lot of questions about my world views that i just didn't know about.

so now, with the insistence that i stay up where everyone lives and stays... how do i say. that is lovely, but i'm soul searching in my free time. *sigh* trust me. it doesn't work so well.

to say the least i am a bit bummed. but i think i will have to find ways to have time alone and think and read regardless. perhaps if i get up early and go to bed early... i can read and have those moments of thought and contemplation. it will make it more difficult.

i have been pondering about sacrifice the last several days. what does it mean? what place should it take in your life? what does it look like? how do you know if it's too much? too little? i tend to be a bit on the masochistic side of life. i take pain well. and can suck up just about anything. and so sacrifice tends to be something comfortable for me... but i am realizing. questioning. where the balance lies. there will be more on this to come. but a little insight into some of the things i'm pondering.